Rinse and repeat

Fucking hell she was pissed right from the moment she entered home. Shoes were flying, bags were getting thrown, jewelry being tossed. Good thing the house had just been cleaned and smelled of fresh jasmines.

They quickly finished dinner, but there was enough time for him to listen to her talk about her shitty day and how there was a rock in her sock just after she left home and someone lost some keys at work, and how some person is a jerk and another is an asshole and how one particular fucker had the balls to comment on her weight and how this girl that was being mentored by her did not deserve such chances at her young age. He always listened to her, well almost. He also always cooked dinner, well almost. Tonight they had ordered in because he had kind of a shitty day too and was really holding back on finding out why the empty shampoo bottle was still at the counter.

She had begun to let go and now sat on the only chair in the house that they both regularly fought for and lit her cigarette. Doing the dishes is his moments of Zen and mediation which he would later learn were actually excellent examples of meditation from his favourite book on the topic.  It was truce time, she had the chair until he finished the dishes and she finished her smoke and then the chair could host the next smoker in line.

But here comes the cracker in this bilateral truce. When he washes the dishes, he takes a mouthful of water and starts gargling until he finished all the dishes that two lonely souls would require to eat a meal. And he kept at the gargling even today, it was his process, it would be very hard to get his attention while he’s at this ritual. But the annoyance of the sound that came was very easy to get anyone else’s attention while he’s at this ritual. It got hers today and it got her good. She came up to him and had to ask him why did he do this shitty gargling thing and that too till he finished all the fucking plates and why the fuck do we even have to use serving bowls, when do we hire a maid!

He didn’t answer for a while until he saw her face and realized that she’s not gonna let it go and he’d rather just answer her and desecrate his ritual tonight. He shows her the finger, the one that means ‘wait’, not the middle one, walks to the bathroom, spits out the water, has one accidental glance at that annoying empty shampoo bottle, walks up to her and tells her this in a rather calm manner –

“You see, I’ve long since discovered that the muscles in my mouth, specially under the tongue that I use to suck your clit are the same ones that I use when I gargle my mouth. So I just use the time I do the dishes to practice or warm up.”

It seemed like one of his usual shitty jokes, but he wasn’t laughing. He knew it was funny, but it was also fucking true. She saw the conviction in his eyes, paused, pretended to do the gargling motion with her mouth and replied, – “Fine, tonight I’ll do the dishes AND your ritual.” She turns around towards the sink, smiles at the tap and tells him, “Now, go and get ready for bed, we’ve both had kind of shitty days” and takes a mouthful.

-The End *wink*-

Tit for tat

She pushed him away and a little bit of his tea spilled on the new carpet / rug thingamajig, but she didn’t seem upset. It was after all her idea to seat him on the floor and take her place on the couch that he leaned his back on.

Her – Come on, you have to show it to me now. You can’t just tease me with a peep like that.

Him – So, you want me to take my shirt off?

Her – If you have to.

Him – I didn’t ask you to stare down my t-shirt while sipping your tea. That’s why we had the TV on. You take yours off and I’ll take mine off.

Her – What? Why? I don’t have any tattoos you can see. At least not one you can see if I took my top off.

Him – No, No… It’s not the tattoos, It’s the titties.

He smiles, places his tea cup down and comes closer to her and softly mutters – I feel shy and I would feel less shy if you took your shirt off too. Pauses and then loudly says – It’s like in the jungle, no one’s wearing any clothes, so no one needs to feel shy.

Her – You just want me to get naked!

Him – Of course. Not. Just the top would do for now. The saying goes, tit for tat. And here you will get to see my tat and my tit in exchange.

Her – True.

A lot can happen over tea too..

Major Tom

He loved his post coital beauty nap and he always slept best on his own bed and a change in mattress meant that he would become unusually chatty. Yet he has started enjoying going over to her home, skimming channels on her TV, clearing things on her table, being in her den, crumpling the sheets on her bed.

When he made love to her here, it was like fucking three different versions of her, past, present and future. Her room was filled with trinkets, rocks from random lakes, jewelry that she didn’t wear, jewelry that she did even own, jewelry that wasn’t even hers, lose pieces of shiny metal that she picked up from random somewheres and always had an amusing story attached to. Her wall had a map of the world her world, places she had been to and was going to.

And right now she was in a place that was fast becoming her new favorite. On his cock, riding him, looking at him in a realization that she’s in control and has him pinned down. Her current happy place. She was riding him like there was no tomorrow and had slowed down now. He just finished and not knowing if she had arrived too, began driving his pelvis towards the roof taking her along for the ride. After a point, the angles get all weird and she begins to slide down and has to open her moist eyes to hold on to his torso to keep her where she was. Up.

Still oblivious to the state of her orgasm, he looks at her and with a wink signals that he is ready for launch if she may so desire and keeps her where she was. Up.

She thought, – Easy tiger, you got me. But smiles with satisfaction and said, “Look how strong your hips are, you’re carrying all of me up so high.”

He thought, – It must be all the years of fucking. But smiles with satisfaction and said, “It’s all this fucking that you and I do.”

He might not have figured out what she looked like when she had cum, but he had figured out what she looked like when she had been made happy.

Two More Nights in Paradise

They had two more nights in paradise and like everyone else who was visiting here they too wanted to make this their permanent home. Who wouldn’t when every evening is filled with cool breeze from the sea, oversaturated sunset colors making the sky look like a Technicolor motion picture and restaurants at the edge of the beach where the ocean just about touches your feet as you nibble away at fresh seafood that all have some form of coconut in them? Yummy!

They sat at the table farthest from the shack and closest to the waves, she had developed a fondness for the sea water tickle me, tickle me not possibility. They just ordered a hearty meal with his favorite prawns and her favorite calamari and of course, beer. Beer is what brought them together in the first place. It was love at first pint! They clinked their mugs that are glowing in the candle light and sipped away as they waited for dinner to be served.

He began to drift away slowly and took his phone out to scroll the shit out of it. She was feeling naughty and called out to him. Without lifting his head, but promptly, he responds with a “What?” She doesn’t reply, she wasn’t going to reveal her secrets until she had all his attention. She calls his name a few more times and gets him to lay his eyes on her to see that she was pulling her blouse down all this while to exhibit the soft skin of her cleavage. He smirks and puts his head back down to his phone and starts whining about the mosquitoes and starts fidgeting with his feet and legs, kicking and ploughing.

Her disappointment turns to an elaborate eye roll and she proceeds to release her finger from the blouse and plonk comes his foot on her chair and his toes trying to squirrel their way to her crotch. She looks up at him in disbelief and he’s got his eyes and a smile waiting to make contact with hers and he says, “Sorry.” She traps his foot in place with her thighs and say’s “I’m not.”

Moral of the story: Love is supposed to be playful.

One car at a time

In a time where dependence on machines in increasing by the second, Machines are taking over the world, one car at a time.

It is not far from when machines do decide that humans are a danger to themselves and will start taking decisions for us.

Here’s what Car autopilots are already capable of.

Tesla Autopilot’s new radar technology predicts an accident caught on dashcam a second later

Antisiesta

“When was the last time the world wasn’t falling apart”? Famous lines from one of my favorite films, Blood Diamond

Everybody lives in a little world of their own and that is a perfectly good defense mechanism.

But when your existence tries to fall apart, a change in scenery and perspective holds the strength to help you move on.

You just need a tiny jolt to wade away the muck and start seeing clearly again.

I chose to pack my bags and go back to my roots, the sea. My ancestors lived by the one of the greatest ports of India, Cochin. They saw the water shape the land and the land shape the water over the ages. It was time I saw how changes can be a good thing too.

A packed bag, some cash and hopping on the next available mode of transport, I took a  solo trip for a day and everything began falling in place after that.

Live updates of my whimsy helped show me that what I do also matters, even if it was to random instagram users who were following the #antisiesta

Antisiesta, by definition means, restless travel.

Antisiesta is NOT luxury travel,

Antisiesta is NOT even a vacation,

Antisiesta is NOT escapism,

Antisiesta is NOT soul searching,

Antisiesta is soul finding.

This video shot on a cheap smartphone documents the nuances of my impulse journey.

 

 

Notes from the Marketing Manager’s desk

Marketing 101

Paper Boat, drinks and memories

I’d like to know who’s at the helm of the marketing division of this company.

Right from the name of the brand’s name to the punchline, they have nailed the associations with the sub conscious of the buyer or even just the prospective buyer.

Did anyone know what the name Rizwan meant? Unless my name was Rizwan or I named someone Rizwan, I wouldn’t be one to know what it meant.

 

This little video is one of the few Youtube ads that I haven’t skipped in some time and it was well worth it.

In true spirit of the notes from the necropsy style, I’d love to reduce it to what or how it makes you blindfolded into buying the product which is what successful advertising is, but just this once I think I won’t.

But just to give you a gist of the emotions it provokes in you,

It highlights all the classic cliches of making you feel empty only to make you fill you up.

-You are unique.

-Fruits (or flowers in this case) of your own hand are always better.

-Dogs are a sign of accomplishment.

-Urban life is shit.

-Simple life is awesome

-Tea is awesome too.

-We just deviated from showing our actual product in our own commercial and showed a hot beverage which is a complete opposite of what we sell. We are genius!

-Rains!

-Childhood romance.

-Fruition of the said romance.

-Action.

-Reminiscence.

-Reassurance that you are indeed unique. (Spend on yourself for as long as you can last/survive)

That’s it for now.

Advertising. Messing with your subconscious decision making capabilities since the bear trap went out of vogue.

Yes.. I’m making a comeback with more of these Notes from the Necropsy

 

7 Predictons for Terminator-Genisys

The generation that caught Terminator 2 Judgment Day early on in their lives is the one that will truly appreciate any terminator movie.

Judgment day was what colors are to painting.  It is a perfect example to reference to the magic of movie editing, top of the line computer generated imagery and not one, but two bad ass robots from the future. And you could train one like it was your puppy.

With the launch of the fifth edition in the Terminator franchise with an eye popping motion poster, a revamp in cast and the clever retention of the popular background score, aniShism would like to present its speculations about the new one.

1. Genisys

I’m guessing this is the name given to some kind of a software or program that either counters skynet or is the what has been controlling skynet all along.

2. Jai Courtney got cast simply because of his resemblance to Christian Bale

 

3. Jason Clarke’s character will turn out to be some kind of a snitch who has a behavior altering epiphany 80% into the story and possibly sacrifices himself.

 

4. Matt Smith has to be a robot. His mortal enemy in Doctor who is a robot. I demand for some irony.

 

5. J.K Simmons, villain!

 

 

6. Byung-hun Lee, you’d expect him to be a robot because of his devoted body and well, Asian features. But he could be as human as the next guy in the film.

7. Emilia Clarke is for this movie what Megan Fox, Rosie Huntington-Whitley and that other underage chick from the transformers movie I did not care to watch watch are to Michael Bay.

Sure, you love her in Game of Thrones, but have you caught this TV film she was in?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ea_yraByJ54

No bucket. But a list

It is like sending the naughty child to stand in the corner of the room. My misbehaving little bitch needs some punitive correction. Such been such a naughty girl this Monday! I’m not into the whole BDSM thing, not regularly at the least.

Never read fifty shades of grey. Don’t even know if I’m making the right references here.

But if my little baby were to be sent off to a desert island. She’d need her

Booze

That stupid sweater of hers

All her silly stuffed toys

Toilet paper &

Me.

Because she cannot do jack to feed herself if I’m not around. The last time she was in the kitchen, she almost made a cake using salt for the flour. I wonder how that would have gone.

Someone Else’s Island

Defining gratitude

The scorching heat in Delhi can get to you faster than a lightning bolt if you are not paying attention and hydrating yourself. If you are a first timer here then this process can get harder while you are looking for directions.

I could not wait to get out of the train that was already late by three hours. I had but a matter of a few hours to spend in Delhi on my first visit there. Before I had to catch an overnight bus to the mountains that night. This had been the longest solo trip of mine yet. A two night long trip from Bangalore had killed my phone and any trace amount of freshness that could be retained with mere deodorants.

What I wanted now was to deposit my big box of camera equipment in a locker. Charge my phone to make 3 maybe 4 calls. See the India Gate and get a beer and some filling quantities of food before it gets too late to get back to the station, pick up my big box and head to the bus station at the other end of the city.

In all this jam packed list of things I had to do. My number one priority was the India Gate. Watching it every year religiously at the Republic Day parade had never been enough for me. I was this close to it. I picked up a rickshaw that would take me there. It was one of those pre-booked rickshaws where the fare was already discussed. For matters of convenience to the driver, two of us with separate destinations were allotted one rickshaw.

The passenger along with me was from my parents’ hometown and it had to be pure coincidence. We struck up a conversation in our native language. The auto driver who had no clear grasp over our language still managed to understand the basics. He got to know that I was here for the first time and that the other guy was a regular to Delhi. He obviously knew we had one too many things in common. Before we could know it, all three of us are in deep conversation about the environment, politics and even choosing wives.

Almost reaching my destination, the driver, summarized our conversation, our little trip, and made a suggestion to the co-passenger about dropping me closer to my destination that previously agreed upon. This would delay both of them by quite some bit. I was surprised that a person with whom I have more in common did not think of this and a complete stranger thought of this. Heck, I did not think of asking this myself.

They politely agreed and dropped me off at a spot where the rickshaw shouldn’t ideally be spending too much time halting. I don’t think I had enough time to thank them enough before the vehicles behind us started honking and the driver made way, waving me goodbye. Leaving me staring at the magnificent India Gate, an ocean of emotions gushing in.

I have a problem with remembering names,  for this one time I wish I didn’t. I want to think these two strangers. Probably the most remembered strangers in all my journeys. I hope to recognize you if I ever spotted you some place and thank you in person.

Thank you.

Also, thanks to small-town girls midnight trains for refreshing this memory in your post.

Never Too Late
http://dailypost.wordpress.com/dp_prompt/never-too-late/#like-93128